I'm Feeling Some Kind of Way....

I remember there being a time where I was never worried about anything at all. I mean I have always been a responsible person, very live and let live, and I mind my own business. I've been hurting alot lately. I'm a very sensitive person, and I do wear my heart on my sleeve, and if I feel like the pressure is too much then, well...I tend to shut down. Well I'm shutting down. To be honest, I thought for the most part that this year was gonna start off with a bang and I know it's only been what, 14 days into the New Year, but I've really been feeling down...more depressed than usual.

Anyone who knows me, knows that if you are good to me, I'll be twice as good to you because I respect and value a friendship as much as any other relationship-- friendships are the foundation to just about anything, but yeah... I'm feeling some kind of way about how people think they can just do and say whatever they want to me and I'm not supposed to get hurt by it....today I got home and had to struggle not to cry, but I sucked it up. As tall as I am, and as stern as my face can be, I'm a big softee and I take things to heart! I really don't know what this post is about anymore, I realized that I've been honest with people in telling them that I like jokes like the next person, but it seems like I set myself up for disappointment because people think that I am someone that is a sucker and they can talk sideways to me.
I think I'm hurting because I feel like I am not being heard. I listen to everyone else's problems but I've realized that people only look out for themselves....I can;t be a ruthless person and just tell everybody to screw off, but what I can do is get rid of the toxic people in my life.... the people that hurt me on a daily basis....